The internet is a wonderful place. Reddit is a wonderful place.
One Redditor decided to ask the women of the internet what the dumbest thing a man has said after sex.
The responses didn’t disappoint.
Here are some of the best:
I have a tattoo of the world on my back. We were doing doggy style and pulled out to c*me on my back. He then exclaimed, “woah, there’s a tsunami in Australia!” I fell on my face laughing so hard.
OOOH boy… I was hooking up with this guy in his on-campus apartment, which he shared with his brother. Brother wasn’t home, so we were doing the do with the bedroom door open (not smart anyway). Brother comes home in the middle of it, sees straight through the hallway into the room. He fumbles around and then leaves.
I’m embarrassed and kinda want to get outta there but he wants to finish so I think what the hell, his brother left anyway so why not. I wonder if he’s close to c*mming so I ask, “are you close?” And he responds with, “Yeah, we’re brothers”
He said “Alexa, play you’re welcome” and the speakers from each side of his bed began to serenade us with Dwayne The Rock Johnson’s voice as Maui from Moana. Luckily we both got a pretty good laugh out of it
Wonder what The Rock would have made of that one.
On to the next.
Ive said a lot of stupid sh*t. The worst was probably “Do you like egg sandwiches?”
Its a full brain re-boot, sometimes programs load up to desktop before we have a chance to close them.
I do enjoy an egg sandwich, FYI.
He told me, with all the sincerity in the world as some weird complement: “You would make a great single mother.”
“Mind if I hit this?” And then he pulled out a vape pen he’d hidden under the bed. My bed. Specifically for this reason.
“Hey, don’t tell anyone about last night. I get enough sh*t for being vegan.” A phrase that has stuck with me for 10+ years. Not so much “dumb” as just cruel..
That one kinda just made me feel sorry for the woman.
“I think I miss my ex…”
You can check out the whole thread here.